7.08.2005

Bathroom ethics

I wash my hands BEFORE going to the bathroom, cause hey, I don't wanna get Mr. Winky dirty.

Also, it's not okay to give your genitalia a name. Don't imagine your d***, imagine people as d***'s

You should not call someone while using the bathroom, but if you must, mute the phone before flushing. Also, no grunting.

It's not a good idea to have communal magazines in the bathroom, or anything else that everyone can fondle while on the toilet.

If a toothbrush is droped in the toilet, clean it with mouthwash, not just water before using again. Clean twice if you didn't flush yet.

Men, if your women drops something important in the toilet, it is your obligation to fish it out for them without wincing or complaint.

Girls, in public restrooms, you are not allowed to use the guys restrooms. Some interesting fellows might find it sexy, but the rest of us don't like the longer line. Besides, you really don't want to go into the guys restroom.

Monthly feminine products go in the toilet, not the trash can where the dog can find them.Farting is allowed at urinals, do not clench. Girls, it is allowed as long as your not in a teen movie where three guys are hiding in the next stall from the school security fat guy.

And lastly, no one wants to see what you did, no matter how impressive.

J

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

1)if a toothbrush is dropped in the toilet, throw it the fuck away! it only cost you a few cents to get a new one, and if you're jeff you can get it free with poultry toothpaste.
2)sometimes girls just have to go in the guys. we don't do it on regularly, or to be sexy, but sometimes you just have to go that bad.
3)monthly feminine products do not go in the toilet unless they specifically say that they are FLUSHABLE. while being in the trash might be gross to you, think how gross it would be if they toilet was clogged and then it was your job to go fishing THAT out...