so in the spirit of funny shit here is a few quotes that i keeled over and wish i had written.
Brian: "First of all to understand what happened to killer, you gotta understand who killer the dog was. Now killer was born to a three-legged bitch of a mother. He was always ashamed of this, man. And then right after that he's adopted by this man, Tito Liebowitz he's a small time gun runner and a rotweiler fight promoter. So he puts killer into training. They see killer's good. He is damn good. But then he had the fight of his life. They pit him against his brother nibbles. And killer said "no man that's my brother, I can't fight nibbles" but they made him fight anyway, and killer, he killed nibbles. Killer said "that's it!" he called off all his fights, and he started doing crack, and he freaked out. Then in a rage, he collapsed, and his heart no longer beat. wow."
Thurgood: "You know uh, I never thought I'd say this to anybody, but you two smoke entirely too much reefer."
Brian: "Get some sour cream and onion chips with some dip, man, some beef jerky, some peanut butter. Get some Haagen-Dasz ice cream bars, a whole lot, make sure chocolate, gotta have chocolate, man. Some popcorn, red popcorn, graham crackers, graham crackers with marshmallows, the little marshmallows and little chocolate bars and we can make s'mores, man. Also, celery, grape jelly, Cap'n Crunch with the little Crunch berries, pizzas. We need two big pizzas, man, everything on 'em, with water, whole lotta water, and Funyons."
Kenny: "That's it?"
Thurgood: "Yeah, get me a box of condoms, and, what was that thing we used to eat back in the day? What was it... oh yeah, pussy."
Scarface: "Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you're cool, and fuck you, I'm out!"
Those freaking holes are never exactly right nor do they actually fit the screws HALF the time they are supposed to. No i am not putting it together wrong. Still its annoying that you have to hurt your hand assembling it because if you use a drill, it fucks it up. WTF?? Why can't things be easy and work the way the say to. In the last freakin few months i have assembled a bit of furniture. Some easy (some like the Ikea bed was bitch), but still why do all things have to have a bit of racking in them. How good are they if they lean a little bit no matter how tight i make them. Damn it. I NEED CROSSBRACING.
see i learned something from structures. fuck. i can't believe i did.
and just for Jim
Fuck fuck fuck fuckity fuck shit cunt goddman stupid piece of shit cell phone.
No one reads this but they will.
click the title to a cool architecture link
so i am going to get back to finding a way of developing a new life here. ciao
i am just going to post things that people should read. I have an idea though. If the rooves of hosptials had solar cells or solar cells that could be placed on top after a storm would it help patients live longer? I ask this so if anyone who read this can answer.
Now some articles ya'll should read.http://www.nytimes.com/2005/09/04/opinion/04rice.html
twice Mr. Bush has let this country down (not counting the war). What do we do now? How do we treat a man who doesn't care for the country who voted him in once. at least the second time he was elected. While he couldn't have prevented this like 9/11 he could have stepped up and been there from day one. He could have not been on vacation over a year of his term in office. While Clinton was slimy he cared for people. He tried to be supportive to those who needed it. GHW Bush didn't do enough for Andrew but then stepped up quickly to help. It breaks my heart and while this blog was supposed to be funny. There is nothing funny about citizens who die because of neglect by their leaders. Nagin and Blanco have done as much as the Feds will let them, the blame goes straight to FEMA and Homeland Security who Bush organized this whole set up. IT doesn't work. Homeland security has been a joke as all reports have shown this summer.
So the buck stops at you Mr. President. I know you want your so-called Christians to run things but they don''t live a Christian life (calling for the death of a leader of a nation?). So I say REGIME CHANGE. Where was the help? When that levee broke everyone watching knew things got worse. When the second and third breaks occured it when from worse to hell. Why didn't the government move faster at getting people out?
Mr. President in great Texan and Southern terms I call you out. Time to stand up to me and all those who stand with me asking simply, WHY?
This is the exit i would use heading west to go home. This scares me.
As far as intelligent design. One of the most obvious things in the world. As for the bible as literal vs parable and stories....well...the parts that say "and he spoke a parable saying" or "in a dream he saw..." obvouisly strories. Most can be taken more litteral though. Such as....don't worship false gods....or don't murder....or go to chruch, be baptized. And things like kicking your wife out of the house during her period....that was old jewish law, leviticus is the OLD testiment, Christ is the NEW testiment. Meaning we follow the NEW law not the OLD law. Those old laws were actually followed back in the day. And most of the new testiment is written in the form of letters and historical documents, not really a debate about it's litteralness...."and paul wrote them saying it is bad to take youre brothers wife, you should seperate yourself from her..." ummm....not much room for interpritation with that type of thing. Yes, Jesus came, and died, and was reborn in 3 days...literal. As for the world being created in 6 days...well...if you believe in an all powerful God able to see, know and do all...that's pretty easy to believe, but honestly, that part doesn't matter that much. There is plenty of scientific evidence to support the rest of the bible and the 6000 year old earth, and it's stories and such. But ne how. That's enough of the basics. You either want to believe in God or not....start there.
Once you get that basic, then we can move onto greater subjects like Christ, the Bible, and higher planes of existance.
I will not have to go off on $cientology because this website does it so well. Man its great. More myth busting and logic showing to come.
I personally recommend Penn & Teller's Bullshit on DVD. This show invesitgates and shows the facts. What's wrong with the facts?
I thought the Scopes-Moneky trial and ALL scientific evidence denounced this nonsense? Seriously, if you take one part of the bible literally then you have to take it all. Even all those laws in Leviticus about kicking your wife out of the house on here period. Sonteing and all that stuff. See the bibles contains parables to explain ideas and beliefs. The book of Daniel is on big parable about belief. The story of Job is too (though way more historically accurate than Daniel). So as Kansas does the stupidist shit in the world its time ot move backward. Look out women you rights will soon be gone as they take the Bible all to literally. What's wrong with looking at the Bible a guide for life? How to treat other people (treat others as you would want to be treated)? How about the book of genisis is parable to explain the beginning of time. According to it we ate from the tree of knolwedge and from that we get the ability to understand the world through science. Instead of through how naked teenagers see things.
So to prevent my self from duplicating someone who has done it better here is a link to a great entry about this whole NON_ARGUEMENT about Intelligent Design. To be an arguement both sides have to have facts and evidence...Evolution has its evidence...
I see a ton of films and always treated like shit. I am a customer. What part of customer service don't they understand? Why are all my fellow movie goers rude and stupid? If I wanted to hear you Mystery Science commentary i would ask for it. Just becuase the guy on the screen is attractive that is no reason for you to yell it when he comes on screen. Also how hard is it to turn off a cell phone? If it is that important don't answer it in there and don't be there. Just leave it in the car if you can't be away from the phone don't be there. I want to throw ice at these people. Just because they sell all that food doesn't me you have to sit in your freakin cart with fat rolls hanging off the edge. There is a reason why you are a fat ass. Also those large cokes are ridiculous. Its sickening how big they are and how expensive considering they cost the theaters about $0.20.
man it sucks going to the theaters. distracted so more to come later.
I was inline to pay for my gallon of milk, orange juice, wheat english muffins and and fruit and the lady in front of me starts writing a check. 20 fucking minutes later her check goes through. So the fat ass lady stands there and just waits for everything to work while i let my millk go warm. fucking shit cunt bitch!!!
Checks have been outdated. They are great for paying bills and mailing them. great for rent. but in public settings now they SLOW up the porocess of purchasing goods and services. I have the right to be able to not have to wait in line for no fucking reason behind you and your freaking checkbook. Best part is when the idiot in front of you doesn't start writing out the check till the items are totaled up. What part of you have time to kill while she scans your fucking fatty sugary shit to write the check out don't you get?
so DO NOT WRITE CHECKS OUT IN LINE. Get a freakin debit card!!
the problem comes up is what should i do? Do i save money and try and buy a flat screen tv and a sound system? Or do i suck it up and igve up film all together? do i drink more? less? make my own films? suffer through AMC's craparific commericals and blow money seeing halfassed attempts at films?
Parachutes - ok this was a solid pop album. Yellow is overplayed but not bad just got annoying whiney. Whiney can be a real problem. Whiney pop, new U2 album minus Vertigo, becomes what people expect. the asshole who put it out deserves ridicule. Now it is their first album so I give them a break.
Rush of Blood to the Head - alright clever title. Many of the songs here should promise, not as much as say radiohead's The Bends or Pablo Honey but then only one band can be that cool at a time. So Coldplay blows up with many simplistic and well written pop songs. Radio comes along and overplayed them like crazy. Radio stations have the ability to take anything remotely good and destroy it like Hiroshima. So overplaying and M-sucks-my fucking-ass-TV comes along and further fucks it up. So for two years all we here is how awesome and incredible and earth changing and music altering Coldplay is. Except they are not anymore earth shattering than Barenaked Ladies...Who are way more fun and more material to show for it. Coldplay is as earthshattering as changing a channel. They aren't but the media fuckheads come along and tell us they are. I listen to them and figure some good stuff some bad but benefit of the doubt since a few songs are really good. Stupid me
X&Y - alright this is a whole album of the same song, same key, different lyrics and its the worst of Coldplay's albums. The 14 whiney and terrible songs meander and are as interesting as diarrhea. Truly fucking awful.
The big problem comes around that the first half talented band to come along gets jerked around and ends up being radio's slave. Not that being played on the radio is bad its just radio sucks. Franz Ferdinad, leaps and bounds more talented than Coldplay, also suffers this fate.
What we has smart music lovers should do is stop listening to radio. You ask "how do I learn about new bands?" first try www.pitchforkmedia.com while not everyband there is wonderful its a good way to start. Second check out other music sites and I suggest two magazines, Spin because they cover more than the top few acts and College Music Journal again good artists are there.
so while I am pissed off at the radio follow this command: COLDPLAY SUCKS AND DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM ANYMORE!!!
Also, it's not okay to give your genitalia a name. Don't imagine your d***, imagine people as d***'s
You should not call someone while using the bathroom, but if you must, mute the phone before flushing. Also, no grunting.
It's not a good idea to have communal magazines in the bathroom, or anything else that everyone can fondle while on the toilet.
If a toothbrush is droped in the toilet, clean it with mouthwash, not just water before using again. Clean twice if you didn't flush yet.
Men, if your women drops something important in the toilet, it is your obligation to fish it out for them without wincing or complaint.
Girls, in public restrooms, you are not allowed to use the guys restrooms. Some interesting fellows might find it sexy, but the rest of us don't like the longer line. Besides, you really don't want to go into the guys restroom.
Monthly feminine products go in the toilet, not the trash can where the dog can find them.Farting is allowed at urinals, do not clench. Girls, it is allowed as long as your not in a teen movie where three guys are hiding in the next stall from the school security fat guy.
And lastly, no one wants to see what you did, no matter how impressive.
And you curse too much.And your hair is somewhat curely
And ya, those catholics...but they get away with everything everywhere. Including sending the masses straight to hell with their false teachings. Which is just a little worse than the man boy love thing, and a lot more widespread.
The Pope is on the top of the list of people to go to hell. Some of the masses might be forgiven for their stupidity, but leaders must be held much more accountable. He is much more educated and should know better. He probalby does, but hey, ultimate power over the earth and the promise of power of souls....it's a nice thought.
But ya, pope to hell. Even in the bible the leaders were always punished worst by God because they were leading others. And even those who passionatly thought they were doing what was right, weren't, and just believing and thinking you're doing the right thing isn't always enough.
But ya, pope to hell. If I ever meet him, I'll try to save him. Seems like a nice guy, but I suppose that's what makes it worse. Like girls who seem sweet, but are really just manipulated me....But ya, pope to hell.
anyways i was watching tv and realized i should share with out 3.41 readers that NEW ORLEANS IS FUCKING STUPID.
besides the school board the city hall and everyone else, now the catholic church here is showing their stupidity.
-Archbishop Hughes worked with/for Boston Archdiocese and Cardinal Law during the major thrust of the sex abuse scanadal.
-Hughes gets promotedto Archbishop of New Orleans and Cardnal Law becoems protector/reverend at one of the biggest most important churches in Catholism.
so logic says that Hughes knew what was happening (he worked closely with priest palcement) in boston. So why isn't his action invesitgated?
Because here Catholics and Baptists get a free pass on their behavior.
This town is fucking stupid.
No one else knew how good we looked though. But then, it was hard for anyone to see us when hiding in an empty feild, looking for trees close enough to the fence that we might be able to clear the razor wire.I found a good spot. The tree was just close enough to the fence to get over, and there was enough leafs to hide us from the onlookers. I signaled Jason and Tyler over.
A car came around the corner, it's lights shined straight into the field. We dove behind trees. We weren't so worried about the car seeing us, we were more worried about the shadows we might cast on the other side of the fence. We didn't need security onto us.
We stayed low, next to the fence, trying to determine what was actually on the other side. The tiger pit was around somewhere, as well as the giraffes. We weren't sure which this one was. We could see the band in the distance. Sounds like Big Bad Voodoo Daddy. There backs were too us. If we went to high, the crowd would see us over their shoulders. To the left there were a few teens hanging out, trying to get away from the parents.
This looked like a good place to get in. But then again, we don't want any razor wire tearing our suits. Getting in was the easy part, it was mantaining the illusion that would be difficult.
We decided on another approach, the tried and true.
We walked back to the road in the dark, then around the complex. We came to the main entrace. We walked around once, checking security, learning, finding the right one...and then, there it was. The perfect spot.
Tyler and I went first. As we approached the gaurd, Tyler pulled out his phone, called Jason. Tyler gave the report, disguised as an investment banker. We walked right past the guard, we were too important for them to bother.
"We're in," says Tyler over the phone. Jason, Dan and Kim follow. And I must say, it's always nice to have him around for a military escort, just in case things get hairy.
There were hundreds of guests. We were the only ones who didn't fork out several hundred bucks to be there. We walked along the tables, the booths. Tyler took his usual martini, I stuck to the vodka. Well, unless you count the rasberry rum slurpee. Nothing like a bartender in a low top dress serving you exactly what you want.
The elephant had already gone in.
Most people here were animal lovers, or at least pretended to be. We did stand out a little when we ate at the booth serving veal over cheese grits. But that's a meal you can't pass up in the south.
Big Bad Voodoo Daddy left the stage. Bag of Doughnuts replaced them. They were good, in their skirts, helmets and Kiss outfits.
We perused the crowd, looking for what we needed. Later, we stood towards the back, looking. Glancing to the right, I see curves. Hair falling over the shoulders, bulding outward at the chest, tucking nicely back in, then smoothing turning back out. A body that was just a little too pefect. I look over, she bites her lips, I catch the eyes move up and down. A smile and a wink to me and Tyler both. I smile and look away, and feel her still anxiously starting. No time for her now. But she'll find us later, just to say goodnight.
As the band finishes, they find us. A tall women with a flower in her hair walks over.
"You know, it's a crime for you men to still be single here." When a women thinks your that rich, you can't take her back to your place.
The short blonde walks up. The one who put it all together.
"Thakns for the party" I say. Then, we walk off. But not without grabbing a bottle of 2001 Camelot for the road.
It has been a very busy year. I've spent 99% of my time planning a huge conference and finishing my masters thesis. So I hardely ever see anyone.
But the people I miss most are my Aron 140 girls! With all the fun and crazy adventures (many of which are featured in the BJ Happy Hour)
So, sending me love to my Aron 140 girls, miss ya'll!!! Sorry I'm never around. Those of you who read this, spread it to the others.
"You seem to be an eternalist with alot of unchecked aggression being generated by your ID. Yearning for attention and a sense of self inflation in order to try and fill your self image which you've created through your superego. By picking fights and getting our attention you are attempting to control others in the room in order to confirm your own existance (especialy because you are afraid of death) This excesive agression is probably steming from your supressed libido which is generating a desire to sleep with your mother in order to obtain a high since of intamacy with the most important women in your life. However, you is unable to do this because I stuffed her last night."
However, for the purposes of this entry..it's somewhat relevant (it being the idea that aliens might exist.)
But let us say they do. It is not likely at all that they are running around in hovering spaceships anal probing hicks and cows. We must think of it like we are aliens. We are aliens to other aliens or creatures from lets say...Melmac. If we were to ever find them, we would probably not be in anal probing hover crafts. It would most like be a probe...but one like the ones we sent to Mars. If they do come to earth, most likely first contact will be in the from of some sort of alien robot that is randomly scouting the universe, just as if one of our probes makes contact out there on Mars. After that...they probably aren't going to take the time to come all the way out here to take the view of most outhouse holes.
But let us take this a step farther. We try to make our robots more and more animal and bug like, because they are better explorers. Try to give them as much intelligence as possible so that they can find there way around and explore on their own without falling down or running in circles. Some most likely they will not have little hovercrafts, but some animal or insect like robot that comes to earth.
And one more step further. Perhaps WE are alien robots!! Aliens sent out "people probes" years ago to study different planets. We are all naturally curious and explorers, and really have a drive to replicate ourselves, and take on the actions that produce replication. I know I could go for some late night replicating action at the moment! Our blood is our oil, our bones our substructure. We compare ourselves to extremely sophisticated computers all the time. And heck, we're even so advanced that we've expanded to other planets in our solar system. Reaching further, and exploring more for out "alien masters." The human mind even gives off tiny electrical signals at all given times. Perhaps we are sending signals back out to our "alien masters." Or perhaps the "anal probes" do happen, and they are done by "probe bots" (seeing as I still stand by the fact that they won't be coming out themselves) And these "probe bots" come to all the human robot inhabited planets, download info from the "port hole" then take it back to Melmac.
I'm thinking this is a pretty good theory. Now to test it with my computer, a usb cable, and some KY. I'll let you know how it goes.
Until then...ponder it....You are just an alien robot.
Walking down campus, she walks past, I walk over out of my way with a la de de la la la and a grin. Smile and give the "hi how are you crap" She's running late...I use it as an excuse to get out and go. Puts me in a horribly fowl mood, and I've been in nothing but a wonderful mood for weeks. The fact that I was so happy and nice was half of what put me in the fowl mood.
Seeing her for just one second usually puts me in a wonderful euphoric and fuzzy mood that I just can't shake for days, but today for the first time it pissed me off to no end. Doing some stuff on campus...walking back, there she is again across the street at the street light. She tries to make goofy faces, I try not to look too pissed or look at her at all really. Cross when the light turns, she stays on the other side with a friend, don't know if she's waiting for me to cross, or if she's going somewhere else or something. I cross, she smiles, I look pissed of, give a bit of a grumbled hey and keep walking. I saw a flash of something in her eye when I walked by, I suppose a realization that I was pissed and was just gonna walk by, which I never do. And I always have this stupid goofy grin on when I see her. But not this time.
There has always been a part of me that has loved her, and a part that hated her (or maybe hated the situation) But the love part always took control of everything, and outweighed everything, by far far far. But today for the first time it didn't. The love is hidden away, hurt, abused. It's still there, and still remembered, but it has no hope at all, and sees no light. So in it's shrivled, torn and weak state, the hate wins out. Putting me in the horrible mood I am now in.
Recently wrote her a very brief e-mail, just a "wondering about you, how are things, good I hope?"No response.
They say you shouldn't give up on something you can't go a day without thinking about. But I think there was this day last week when I didn't think about her. Though it may have been a year since she's even really thought about me at all.
Is she afraid of something? Does she just not want anything to do with me (well...obviously she doesn't) Is it fear, hate, apathy? Does she just not care anymore. Did she never care...I don't think that was possible. I could always see in her eyes...that I couldn't possibly want to be anywhere else, or with anyone else, ever (at the moments we were in those brief moments. I remember one time in particular...I can see her eyes then. It was in the eyes. Now....I don't see them, and when I do...I can't read them. They hide from me.
So now...do I give up...which I pretty much have already done. Decided awhile ago to give up. But I haven't really let go. So do I just say screw it and force myself to never think about her again? Do I say, oh well, I'll just remember the good times and forget the rest. Do I give one last call, one last chance. A...look..this changes or it ends now forever (though she never answers the phone or returns my calls...so might not be possible) When I first was going to give up, was just going to leave some flowers on the door, and a little note saying goodbye, unless you don't want me to say goodbye type of thing. Maybe I should still do that. Maybe I should call and yell, or leave a pissed off message saying go to hell.
The perfect situation...she'd call...say, I want you in my life again. But that's not going to happen. All hope is gone. I do know though that I dont' want to feel such hatred when I see her. I want nothing but love in my heart for her, and nothing but happiness for her. She could probably easily be happy, but won't let herself it seems.
Sigh...what to do.
Maybe I'll just send her a link to this. Or maybe I should just think about how I should really not still be thinking about her. She just has that kinda hold on me. Probably pretty pathetic of me.
Opposites of Existance.
It is not possible for something to be whatever it is without something that is not what it is. You cannot be hungry if you cannot be not hungry. If we were always hungry, it would just be the state we are, it wouldn't be hunger. There cannot be dark without light. There cannot be heaven without hell. There cannot be our plane of existance without a plane of existance that is not ours. There cannot be self without others.
Socrates states that "I think therefore I am." This makes sence, and establishes a self. For us to have a sence of "self" there must be something that is not our self. That is any other conciousness or precence that is not us.
You know what...I"m gonna come back to this later. The other day when I was laying in bed, and sitting in classes, I really worked out all this theory, and knew where I was going with it, but I seemed to have lost it for the moment. I will have to revisit it later, and first start by better proving the point that nothing can exist without something existing that is not it, or is it's opposition.
Why...well...that is pretty easy to answer. We know the answer. Someone asks, hey, are you hungry, it basically means "wanna go get some food." So why would we say why?
I am not sure why, I know I ask the why, I just did a moment ago. I believe it is as not to feel rude. Just saying no is great for drugs, but seems rude in conversation. So abrupt...no....and nothing else, seems so empty. So...we ask why to be polite maybe? And also, to get more details. Cause you can't really say, "I'm not really hungry, but what did you have in mind, I am assuming you mean we should go get some food, and maybe you'll suggest something that sounds good and I'll be on board, but I really am not that hungry...so..I dunno.." So therefore the "why" leads into deeper conversation.
But sometimes that why is really neccessary.Lets try an example without the why....
"Are you dead?"
"Okay, see ya soon."
hmmmm....leaves lots of questions. Now, lets try with the why.
"Are you dead?"
"Oh, I was just supposed to drop something off, and hadn't seen you around for awhile, so was wondering if you were still alive."
"Okay, come on over."
See....you go from wondering if someone is coming over to kill you, to picking up a ticking package. Why's can help.
Now you might ask, why do I have nothing better to do than write this? The answer is...I do have better things to do, I'm just a procrastinator.
Speaking of evil republicans who in their right mind wants to limit people's freedoms...don't you want everyone to be able to pursue the american dreams? ...enoungh of that
weird that J talks about ppl falling out of our lives. I thought about one person the other day a ceertain woman in TX who i though i was good friends with and i thought she was smart. then the dumb ass lets a boy decide who she can talk to and such. who does that? she obviously is insecure and this is also the first serious relationship she has had.
what a bitch.
well time to fuckin make a move on yo...
dern "diary" Many of which are most pleasent, though many
bring back memories of people who don't really exist in my
It is always a shame when someone close drops out of your
life. Would be easy not to if the other person would just
make some kind of simple effort.
Life could be so easy, but people complicate it of the
studpiester or things which they can't explain or justify,
they just do. Perhaps they do it to feel the emotions of
love and pain associated with the trouble they create. It
may be pain, but at least they feel something.
Still gonna try and start updating this thing again,
hopefully most will be more funnier than this though.
Hopefully some people give me some good memories worth
writing in this thing and sharing.
Oh...and super date girl...went crazy again. Here and